“Did you know that some people think that kids’ lives are easy?”
A collective loud gasp of shock punctuated by cries of “that’s not true!” and “WHAT?!” greeted my question to a summer camp full of 3rd-5th grade kids.
One boy looked me straight in the eye, “our lives are hard, really hard because this world is hard.”.
That boy perfectly summed up the point I was trying to make. Regardless of your age, doing life in this world is hard. Doing life as a follower of Jesus is even harder! Doing life as a follower of Jesus serving others might just be the hardest of all.
I often remind leaders that it feels hard because it is hard. In ministry—especially in ministry to children and families—I believe we are on the front lines of the battle. The enemy would much rather silence and discourage us than see us persevere.
Over 10 years ago when I was speaking at a summer camp, I had a line of kids next to me in the chapel who were sharing their life stories with me one at a time—I was hearing the good, the bad, and the ugly. Emphasis on the ugly.
The enemy would much rather silence and discourage us than see us persevere.
So much hurt and so much pain.
As the last one poured her heart out to me, I felt my soul crumble. I couldn’t do it anymore. I prayed with her like a good camp pastor, but then I went and sat in my car and cried my eyes out telling God I was done.
How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout
How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout
How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout
Ministry Is Hard
I was done doing ministry, I was done listening, I was quitting. And I even remember asking God to take my calling because I didn’t want it anymore.
I could blame that crisis moment on camp exhaustion, my less than amazing camp lodging, or even the camp food that seemed to only require the “cooks” to use a can opener to make meals. However, the reality is it was a crisis, a turning point.
I was carrying everything and everyone and very suddenly realized I couldn’t do it anymore. The joy and the pain of ministry were all colliding, and I was bent over under the weight of it all. God in His kindness began to reveal to me some very important lessons about doing ministry in the hard and the messy.
1. It’s okay to admit it’s hard.
Because it is. It’s okay not to put a neat bow on everything and simply admit it’s hard it hurts. Among many Christ followers, there is an epidemic of trying to force everything to be good or look good when everything is not good.
We can sit in the pain without fixing it. Because we aren’t meant to fix it anyways.
2. I am not the Holy Spirit.
I am not the great fixer or savior. No matter how much I want to, I cannot make kids respond or make them change or even change their circumstances. I can be obedient. I can pray for them. And I can point to the Holy Spirit, but I cannot take on His job.
I do my job best when I point to Him and when I continually surrender myself and the burdens I feel to Him.
3. I must spend time with Him.
In order to point to Him, I have to be sure I’m spending purposeful time with Him. I must be in the Word. When I’m in the Word, I can have healthy perspective. I cannot help but be reminded of God’s ability to handle this broken world. I can’t help but be reminded that He has a plan, and He is good.
And I do not have to understand it in order to trust it.
4. I need someone who will listen to me.
I need counselors in my life—people who know me and are not afraid to call me out. And I have a therapist who helps me know when I’m reaching my limit and when I need to take a moment, or a day, or even a week. It’s okay to get help. Actually. It’s more than okay—it’s good to get help.
5. It’s a privilege to be present in the hurting.
Once I’ve gone through steps 1-4, I reach the point where the very pain that I was being crushed by is now a privilege. His yoke is easy, and His burden is light (Matthew 11:30). Most people who are hurting do not need you to fix it—they simply need you to be present.
When we sit with people in their pain instead of quickly trying to move them through it or fix it for them, we have the privilege of exemplifying that the God of the universe is present in their story, at all times. It’s not pretty or easy, but it is a privilege.
We serve a God who is in control, a God who redeems, and a God who is purposeful.
We Serve A Good God
I got a text a few weeks ago from a former camper at one of the camps I have spoken at through the years. It read, “I had you for back-to-back-to-back years at camp. You changed my life. I remember bawling my eyes out, you hugged me and said, ‘I’m sorry someone’s done this to you.’ That really did change my life.”
I was present, and my presence pointed that student right to Jesus. That’s a privilege.
Friends, it feels like a lot because it is. I regularly remind myself that nowhere in the Bible are we promised that it will be easy or always feel good.
In fact, we’re reminded that this world is not our home (Hebrews 13:14). We’re reminded that in this world we will have trouble (John 16:33). We’re reminded that it will be hard, and it will feel hard (2 Corinthians 4:8-10).
BUT we serve a God who is in control, a God who redeems, and a God who is purposeful. The same God who tells us we will have trouble reminds us in the very same verse, “I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).
We serve a good God.
Read More From Melissa J. MacDonald
The Importance of Faith Formation in Your Volunteers
If we want our kids to follow God, we need to set an example through our ministry leaders.
Created for Wonder: How to Recapture Wonder in Your Life
God’s wonder constantly inspires kids. Read how can you reclaim that wonder for yourself!
When Kids Walk Away from Their Faith
This article includes thoughtful insights as we, as leaders, watch kids make their own choices in their faith journey.
How to Welcome Families and Engage Kids in Big Church
We can’t engage kids in church if they don’t show up. Families need to know that you want them to come. Noise and all!
Spiritual Formation in the Church, Home, and Community
Be encouraged and do not grow weary in doing good. God is with you and He is in the business of working through kids.
Take a New Grip: Encouragement for Children’s Ministers
The grip we had in March is no longer effective in August. Let’s keep asking God what He has for us!
